Aileen の流浪地圖

Do you love me??

2008/3/10  上午 11:16:04  (R)メイビー(R) Are you there??

2008/3/10  上午 11:19:14  (R)メイビー(R) Next time, we’ll talk about our relationship！

When I get this msg…Suddenly, I can’t hear anything！

My heart was broken up and painful??

Because I understand him.. When he thinking or decided about something.

He’ll tell you… if not, he never says anything!!

Now, I’ll thinking about before our relationship…

When we leave each other alone, our contact more and more lose.

I still believe… if we love each other, we can overcome many hurdles!!

Even we are not contact every day.

Maybe, I’m wrong… if you don’t care your girlfriend or boyfriend.

You’ll forget before you guys promise and good time.

Because some allures was follow you, never go away…

Did I love him??

This is a question, I ask myself maybe one hundred times?

But I still not sure my answer…

If I didn’t love him, why am I always thinking about that and almost crying?

Every night in my dream, I see him… I feel him…

I try to say something with him, but I can’t！！

When we was chat, it likes anything didn’t happen?

Clammily, lonely… anything else

I never talk with my heart.

I know, sometime he gave me a sense of security…

But I still feel unhappy… because of our long distance.

I looking for see him, but I never told him…

It’s was drive me crazy！！

I really want him say something with me…

Even just say “Hi! How are you doing today?”

I wait one time, two times… Finally, I give up…

He can control my heart and my feeling.
I love him? I don’t know?

Now, I have three choices！

First, if he tells me, he has new relationship in Japan.

I hope I can give up this long distance and blessing him.

Second, if he tells me, he wants stay in Japan and hope I don’t need wait him.

After I’ll be give up and blessing him.

Third, if he tells me, he wants continue our relationship. (I think it’s impossible)

Actually, I don’t know what should I do? The right of service not in my hand.

I was tired… about love and anything else…

I don’t want to him leave me alone.

But I know we can’t take care each other in the future. If we don’t have love.

Also he and I still have this problem… We can’t get happy forever.

Whatever, I’ll be a good listener.

I don’t want give him any pressure and bad temper.

I wish him happy and brave. Although, if we have to broken up.I still thanks for him…